If you have been watching the hit t.v show swingtown then you have an idea what todays blog will be about and that is "revisiting the rules" within your relationship. On the last episode, the experienced couple faced a situation that caused them to do this very thing.

The husband, who is a pilot, started a new route to Japan. On his trips, he stays the night and the crew gets together for an after flight party. He ends up sleeping with one of his crew memebers and later his wife finds out about the event. We later learn that the woman whom he slept with, was on their list of people that it was ok to play with. However, it wasn't ok that his wife didn't know about it before hand. This caused a bit of drama to unfold.

The couple later discussed the issue and decided to revisit the rules of their swinging relationship and how they play with others. For the most part, they decided to be exclusive until they can regain their footing and understand the feelings they were having.

In his mind, it was ok because the crew member was "On the list", but he failed to tell his wife ahead of time. So naturally she felt betrayed. This brings up some very interesting points. If your relationship allows each other to swing without your significant other present, how would you feel if you were not informed or told about it ahead of time or even after the fact?

Much of this lifestyle is based on trust, trust that your partner will always make you feel safe and secure within your relationship, if that is broken or even bruised then revisiting the rules is a good idea

But how do you go about that? Do you just forget about the lifestyle or do you do what this couple did? Communication is extremely important when a couple is having sex with others outside their relationship. It is a good idea that each other understand the rules and boundaries that are in place the preserve the integrity of their relationship. If not, this could have a disastrous result. Don't be afraid to ask questions and clarify what you expect from the other. No question is to silly, and well defined rules are a must.

So what do you do if you think your partner has crossed the boundary? As in the show swingtown, it might be a good idea to become exclusive again until the feelings are all sorted out. I would suggest writing the rules down on paper, so if such an occasion should occur, you could revisit it and redefine them so you both are ok with what you are doing. Your relationship should always come first. I would like to hear what you think. Have you had a similar experience? If so, let the readers know!